Dating can be so aggravating. You meet a man, you date him, and then you or him break it off. It’s a never ending cycle.While it may seem like you will never find love - never mind keep it - it’s not impossible. All you need to do is understand what you are doing wrong, learn what you need to do right, and then put it into action.
Understanding What’s Wrong and Correcting It
When you think back on your dating history and past relationships, is there a consistent theme in them? For example, do you often break it off with the person, or does he usually break it off?If you typically break off the dating relationship, it may signal that you either have trouble identifying people’s characteristics quickly enough, or you have a fear of commitment.
Don’t rule out the fear of commitment too quickly. Many people don’t even know they fear commitment until they start looking back on their relationships. All of sudden, they realize that as soon as they started getting emotionally close to the person they would find faults in him and break it off.
If you believe it’s more of not being able to figure someone out fast enough to decide if you should continue dating him, you can easily learn some tricks to improve on that.The way to quicken the process of figuring someone out is thinking and asking the right questions. The first date, and sometimes the second one as well, is the get to know you stage. It’s the one in which you identify the deal breakers.
Think about what your deal breakers are, and then come up with questions to identify those deal breakers. While you don’t want to rattle off question after question, you do want to ask them as naturally as possible throughout the conversations you have with a new date. This is why going to the movies isn’t the best first date. You need one in which you get to speak to your date, and speak to him a lot.
Now, no one says you have to be face to face with the person to ask your questions, for instance, if you meet someone online. You don’t have to go on a date just to find out if that person may be a possible long-term lover. Instead, asking your deal breaker questions can be done online through chat, webcam, or whatever other interaction you have with him.
Also, if you just meet someone briefly, and exchange numbers, you can have a conversation with him on the phone before setting out on the date. This can actually save you a lot of time. For example, if you don’t want to date someone with children, you can find out quickly if he has them by asking on the phone, and then making an excuse why you can’t go on a first date with him.
Put It All Into Action
Now that you know how to figure out what lay be going wrong with your love life and how to fix it, you can go on to make changes to how you date. You’ll notice right away that you’ll feel much more confident, and finally feel like you are on the right path – the right path to the love of your life.
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